Making the Right Choice: 8 Life Areas Gen Z and Millennials Often Struggle With

Last updated: February 3, 2026

Doubting your choices is normal. But for many Gen Zers and millennials, it feels especially heavy because there can be a lot of pressure, a lot of options, and a lot of uncertainty all at once. Performance pressure is an important factor in that. In 2025, 61 percent of Dutch young people between the ages of 12 and 30 said they regularly or often experience performance pressure. And that is not only about school or studying, but also about future plans, work, and even social media.
https://www.nji.nl/databanken/cijfers/cijfers-over-prestatiedruk

This blog is meant to give you more overview. Not to tell you what to choose, but to help you choose in a way that fits you better. This is not medical or financial advice. If you feel stuck, contact your GP.

Why choices can feel so heavy right now

A lot of doubt comes down to three things:

Social pressure
What do other people think, am I behind, do I belong

Future perspective
What if I choose wrong now, what if I regret it later

Doubt
Am I good enough, can I do this, do I deserve this

And on top of that, practical stress is very real. Think of housing costs and student debt. In 2024, CBS published that the total student debt of current and former students had risen to 29 billion euros at the start of 2024.
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2024/41/minder-mensen-met-studieschuld

And in 2025, CBS reported that the average student debt had increased even further.
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2025/39/opnieuw-minder-mensen-met-studieschuld

Housing pressure is also high. In 2025, CBS reported that more than a quarter of young adults still living at home want to move out but cannot find housing.
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2025/16/ruim-kwart-thuiswonende-jongeren-wil-uit-huis-maar-kan-geen-woning-vinden

In other words: doubt is not only a mindset issue. It is often a mix of your inner world and your environment.

8 areas that often create doubt, plus what can help

1) School or study

Where the pressure often shows up
Feeling like you need to make the perfect choice, not being allowed a detour, being afraid of falling behind

What helps
Choose a direction, not a final identity. Many choices can still be adjusted.

Mini step
Write down what you want to learn, not what you want to prove.

2) Parties and social life

Where the pressure often shows up
Wanting to belong, not wanting to miss anything, needing to recharge while still feeling like you should show up

What helps
Make a distinction between connection and simply being present.

Mini step
Plan one moment each week that truly fills you up, even if it is not “socially busy.”

3) Housing

Where the pressure often shows up
Wanting to start your life, but getting stuck because of availability and affordability

What helps
Work with scenarios instead of one ideal picture.

Mini step
Make three options: ideal, realistic, temporary. Give each option one action for this week.

4) Money

Where the pressure often shows up
Uncertainty, student debt, feeling like you have little control

What helps
Control starts with overview. Nibud researches the financial situation of students and also offers a lot of practical information.
https://www.nibud.nl/onderzoeksrapporten/rapport-studentenonderzoek-2024/

Mini step
Make one overview: what comes in, what goes out, what is left. Only then start optimising.

5) Sport and health

Where the pressure often shows up
Wanting the perfect routine, going all or nothing, comparing yourself to others

What helps
Consistency beats perfection.

Mini step
Choose a minimum that is always possible. For example: move for 20 minutes twice a week.

6) Love and relationships

Where the pressure often shows up
Decision stress, dating apps, fear of settling, or fear of being alone

What helps
Choose based on safety and values, not based on urgency.

Mini step
Write down 3 things you need in order to feel safe in connection.

7) Social media

Where the pressure often shows up
The perfect image, comparison, feeling like you always have to be visible

What helps
Your online life is also an environment. You are allowed to curate that environment.

Mini step
Mute 10 accounts that make you feel unsettled. Follow 5 accounts that feel more honest and calmer.

8) Work and career

Where the pressure often shows up
Wanting to choose the perfect job, being afraid of getting it wrong, feeling like you need to grow fast

What helps
See work as a learning path. Not every step needs to be the final destination.

Mini step
Choose one skill you want to build this quarter. Focus on growth, not status.

The choice compass: how to make decisions with more calm

Use this in 10 minutes for any choice that keeps hanging over you.

Step 1: What is the real goal?
Calm, growth, freedom, money, connection, health

Step 2: What are the conditions?
Time, energy, money, place, mental space

Step 3: What is a good enough choice for now?
Not perfect. Just fitting.

Step 4: Close it and take one action
One email, one appointment, one decision. After that, stop reopening it.

What this has to do with Like Charlie

Like Charlie is here to make mental health easier to talk about and to start and keep the conversation going. Doubt and social pressure are themes we often see reflected in people’s stories, and also in our story prints.

View all story print T shirts:
https://www.likecharlieclothing.com/collections/t-shirts

Discover the question card game to make real conversations easier:
https://www.likecharlieclothing.com/collections/vragenspellen

Read our story and find out who Charlie is:
https://www.likecharlieclothing.com/pages/het-verhaal

Back in 2023, I invited you to check out our Doubt print. That invitation still stands. If you search for “Doubt” within the T shirts collection, you will find it quickly.

FAQ

How do I know if my doubt is normal or too much?

If you feel stuck for weeks, worry a lot, sleep badly, or your choices start blocking your daily functioning, it is wise to seek help.

What is the best first step when dealing with decision stress?

Limit your options to 3 and set a deadline. After that, choose and close it.

I’m afraid of regret. What helps?

Regret gets bigger when you keep comparing after your choice. Choose, learn, adjust. Life is often about iterating, not making one perfect leap.

When is professional help a good idea?

If doubt is linked to long lasting anxiety, low mood, or panic. Start with your GP.

Young people: https://www.injebol.nl/
Adults: https://wijzijnmind.nl/

Extra FAQ: making choices with less doubt

How do I know what I want to do with my life?

Do not start with the perfect answer, start with direction. Choose one theme that feels important right now, such as calm, growth, freedom, connection, or health. Then write down three things that give you energy and three things that drain your energy. Your direction is often already in there.

How do I choose a study programme when I am unsure?

Choose based on your interests and learning style, not status. Make a top 3, plan one open day, trial day, or conversation for each option, and set a deadline. Many people adjust later, and that is normal.

How do I stop comparing after I have made a choice?

Make one rule: after I choose, I do not check alternatives anymore unless there is new information that is genuinely important. Comparing after the choice is often the biggest cause of regret.

How do I make a big decision feel less overwhelming?

Break it into steps. First the goal, then the conditions, then 3 options, then one decision, then one action. Big choices feel smaller when you break them down.

What if I am afraid of making the wrong choice?

Remind yourself: many choices can be adjusted. A choice is rarely forever. Ask yourself: what is a good enough choice for now that gives me movement?

How do I deal with pressure from parents or friends?

Say it calmly and clearly: “I know you mean well, but I want to figure this out in my own way.” If it helps, share your choice compass: your values, your conditions, and why this fits for you.

How do I know if stress is keeping me from choosing clearly?

If you sleep badly, worry a lot, become overstimulated quickly, or cannot really feel anything about the options anymore, that is often a sign that you need recovery first. Go back to the basics: sleep, food, movement, and connection. Choosing gets easier after that.

When should I seek help for decision stress?

If you feel stuck for weeks, if choices are blocking your daily life, or if your anxiety or low mood is increasing. Start with your GP or use a support resource such as In je bol or MIND.

Sources

Performance pressure figures among young people (NJi)
https://www.nji.nl/databanken/cijfers/cijfers-over-prestatiedruk

Student debt figures (CBS)
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2024/41/minder-mensen-met-studieschuld
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2025/39/opnieuw-minder-mensen-met-studieschuld

Housing and young people (CBS)
https://www.cbs.nl/nl-nl/nieuws/2025/16/ruim-kwart-thuiswonende-jongeren-wil-uit-huis-maar-kan-geen-woning-vinden
https://longreads.cbs.nl/jeugdmonitor-2025/wonen/

Student finances (Nibud)
https://www.nibud.nl/onderzoeksrapporten/rapport-studentenonderzoek-2024/